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Why I Write!

In my first blog post, I wrote a little bit about how writing wasn't a newfound love. How I wanted to be a journalism major before finding out, through experience, that journalism wasn't necessarily for me. I mean I guess I could've gone and joined an opinion branch of a local newspaper, but I figured sticking to my unrestricted form, free of restraints was more my go. My mom and her background in English and literature definitely helped me find my own little niche in the act of writing.

I remember sitting in my room throughout middle school, listening to songs or instrumentals and even coming up with lame lyrics. Or even rewrite those lyrics in a way I thought an artist would jot them down in a composition notebook. No I was never good at lyrics and HELL NO, they would've never been good in an actual song. But those who know me know that. The pages of my notebook would be so broken in from stories I would write, poems I'd create, and lyrics I'd copy down. I think at some moments I just liked the feel of writing in a notebook, as opposed to the other times when I really wanted to let something out.

Throughout high school, I hated English class. It's wild how bad a lot of us are with the language we speak naturally. Middle school and high school really show you all the rules we have. Along with all of the slang, which is what I use and a lot of us use daily, everything put together makes our language pretty difficult to learn. I would assume. I'll be honest, with the way that I write, I just write. I don't use a lot of punctuation because it's casual. Poems get nothing but a period or comma, too. I don't have the time to worry about if that was a run on sentence because most of the time..... I don't care. What I write privately is for me.

I did take on a creative writing class my senior year. One of the coolest classes I took. Not only was our teacher incredibly understanding, but she basically let us write whatever we wanted. She gave us a structure or a direction, but let us pick any direction following. The amount of creativity that spread through the classroom from freshman to seniors was impressive. The stories ranged from emotional, to funny, to super creepy even. Every now and then things would get borderline inappropriate for a high school classroom, but that's the freedom we had. She knew that true writers and creative thinkers couldn't have all of these boundaries. And this was the time frame that I reeeeeally knew that writing wouldn't just disappear from my life.

It is a way for me to privately express a feeling of anger, happiness, or confusion. Typing things out or writing things down is a way for me to get through a time of stress or uncertainty. Or even joyous moments in life. Topics range from life events all the way to current events going on in the world. Every now and then I'll start a random story. Brand new characters and a plot. I don't plan it or think about it, I just start writing. It can and was a way for me to communicate. Hell yeah I wrote my girlfriend notes in high school. I like to think I had little way with words back in the day! The young bucks send text messages now, they don't understand what it was like passing a letter on the way to third period. Genuine!

I continued this hobby throughout college, with breaks here and there when the light dimmed in that part of my brain. I think it may have had to do with the process of finding out who I was, what I wanted to do, and what all this life meant. Plus the hectic life of a student-athlete (Which everyone seems to think is the life and shouldn't require a payment scheme for the athletes, but that's for another time). I quickly picked back up through my transfer to Wake Forest and the following year entering my first year in the NFL. The year in Oakland where I mentioned finding out who I was, writing had kept me sane. Sane while transitioning into a profession that carried so much weight from the outside world. It kept me focused while being able to note my goals and my thoughts throughout training camp. Seeing it on paper is always better than just having that thought. Shit can get stressful when your job is on the line daily. When every day is a new interview for the biggest job of your life. As the vets used to say, "This shit ain't for everybody." Everybody has their own outlets from team to team in my experience. Writing was just one of my main ones.

Making this a routine has allowed me to find new interests. Writing about things that I never knew I really had any interest in in the first place. I wrote one night about some pictures I took on my phone. I talked about how the quality has increased over the years, adding in something about DSLR cameras. Later that week, because of adding that I researched a bit about how the price range of cameras were. Found out that I did have a curiosity about photography and maybe even videos. I bought my first camera, started vlogging a bit, and taking pictures. No expert, but just that little piece brought a whole new hobby into my life without effort. Recently it has drawn people into my life that have an interest in reading stuff like this or writing as a whole. Different forms of writing can be very interesting. With styles and techniques that many people have, it is never the same. Just like every author is different from the books they create.

Overall, it has just been a way of keeping that creative side of my brain flipped ON at all times. I can't see a time where I stop completely. It's a part of who I am and shapes a lot of the decisions I make in my life. I can always express whatever I want through this form. And that's dope to me. I appreciate those who have followed the early stages of what's been a really fun addition to my weekly schedule. This blog, like stated, is just a way to further my writing and implementing a public way of doing it. So thanks for supporting so far!

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